Category: Hard-to-find

Cover Versions, Hard-to-find

Reissue! Revalue! Repackage!

Craig McAllister

…in more ways than one. Morrissey, the Wilderness Years began in 1995 and lasted, some would say until 2004’s ‘You Are The Quarry’ album. He floated between labels, juggled his band line-up around and, possibly due to the fact he was whoring himself around Hollywood at the time, failed to capitalise on the jingoistic nature of BritPop and all that jazz. I actually think he’s still in the middle of a wilderness as I write, but who am I to say? I don’t go to his gigs these days; have you heard his band? Have you seen his band? 4 bouncers playing bad rock with about as much soul as a lump of wood. And I don’t buy the new stuff. That new single about someone squeezing his skull is, bluntly, shite. So why on earth he’s decided to re-release the 2 worst selling (if not actually just worst overall) albums in his catalogue at this precise moment in time is a mystery that not even Miss Marple could solve.

fat morrissey

This alarming man

Except he’s not actually re-releasing them, he’s re-presenting them. Southpaw Grammar and Maladjusted have been fiddled about with. They’ve both been given new artwork. Both running orders have changed. Whole songs have disappeared (bye bye Maladjusted‘s lead-off stinker of a single ‘Roy’s Keen’), old b-sides and previously-binned tracks have taken their place (hello ‘Sorrow Will Come In The End’). Yes. Sorrow Will Come In The End. Yes? Yes, because it’s a belter.

morrissey last supper

‘Friend, do what you came for’

It starts like Nick Drake, all downbeat cello and string quartet. It continues with all the pathos of prime beehive-era Shangri-Las or Dusty Springfield. Whips crack. Flutes shrill. It goes into waltz time. Neil Tennant frantically starts scribbling in his Big Book Of Songwriting Tips. Why is it so good? Cos old sourpuss is singing about his court battle with Mike Joyce, where the amiable drummer won and claimed his share of the Euro Millions. It’s a stinging tale of hatred and revenge. But you knew that already. If you didn’t, you could work it out for yourself…

mike joyce

Here’s the words, every last stinging one of ’em…

Legalized theft
Leaves me bereft
I get it straight in the neck
(Somehow expecting no less)
A court of justice
With no use for Truth
Lawyer …liar
Lawyer …liar
You pleaded and squealed
And you think you’ve won
But Sorrow will come
To you in the end
And as sure as my words are pure
I praise the day that brings you pain
Q.C.’s obsessed with sleaze
Frantic for Fame
They’re all on the game
They just use a different name
You lied
And you were believed
By a J.P. senile and vile
You pleaded and squealed
And you think you’ve won
But Sorrow will come
To you in the end
And as sure as my words are pure
I praise the day that brings you pain
So don’t close your eyes
Don’t close your eyes
A man who slits throats
Has time on his hands
And I’m gonna get you
So don’t close your eyes
Don’t ever close your eyes
You think you’ve won
OH NO

Here‘s the music.

One of the first ever things I wrote on Plain Or Pan was about Morrissey‘s version of ‘Moon River’. Often since requested, I’ve decided to do my own bit of Reissue! Revalue! Repackage! by reproducing the original feature below…

morrissey hold on

Anyone with a reasonably good set of ears will know that ‘Vauxhall & I’ is by far Morrissey’s best solo work. Only just ahead of ‘Your Arsenal’, but much, much better than the over-rated ‘You Are The Quarry’ it is a classic of sorts. Released in 1994, the playing, the songwriting and the vocal delivery all come together on a near-perfect wee album. It kicks with the melancholic majesty of ‘Now My Heart Is Full’ and gets better as every new track comes in. The singles released from the album were all (in my head) number 1 smashes.

All (in reality) were not what could be called ‘chart botherers’. The first single ‘The More You Ignore Me’ went in at a respectable number 8. ‘Hold On To Your Friends’ did less well. Straight in at 47 before tumbling to 74 and off the radar forever. Which is where we come in. You see. On the b-side was Morrissey’s version of ‘Moon River’ All 9 minutes and 38 seconds of it. He croons! He swoons! He goes on a wee bit! But it’s magic. For a while, the inclusion of this track meant that ‘Hold On To Your Friends’ was a reasonably valuable Morrissey single to own. However, a quick trawl through eBay shows it is not quite as sought after as it once was. Nonetheless, your life is not complete until you’ve heard it. So here it is, in all it’s majestic glory.

Dylanish, Hard-to-find, Most downloaded tracks

Bin there, done that

Craig McAllister

Bonjour tout le monde. My muse has deserted me recently, leading to a slowing down of me posting new stuff. I cannae even be arsed writing a proper review of last night’s Bob Dylan show in the big red shed at the SECC. But it was a belter. Visions of Johanna and everything. Way better than the last time I saw him (2 years ago) when his band pulled out 4 and a half minute guitar solos every chance they got. My review of that show even caused a minor stir in the Dylan community at the time. How dare you slag off Bob, and all that. It’s here if you have a spare couple of minutes.

I’d like to welcome anyone who’s visiting for the first time after reading the bit I did for the Vinyl Villain. I’d also like to take this opportunity to encourage any regulars on here to pay a visit to the Vinyl Villain. His blog is regularly updated and consistently excellent, which is something I can’t really say for Plain Or Pan these days.

tcs-bw

Special band, Special Needs.

I wrote a piece on the Trashcan Sinatras for the Vinyl Villain. He’s off on holiday and asked for some ‘guest’ contributors for the whole of May. My piece was posted yesterday and the traffic I’ve received due to it is very welcome. As a thank you, here‘s another hard-to-find Trashcan’s obscurity – the download-only studio version of Hammertime. Originally released electronically via the band’s very short-lived Picnic Records website a couple of years ago, it is now unavailable. Unless you shell out £40+ for the All The Dark Horses limited edition 10″. Or unless you click the link above, of course. Given the right setting (an official album of rarities or the b-side of a hit record) Hammertime would shine. However it has been relegated to a footnote in the Trashcan’s wonderful discography. It deserves a second chance. Go on. Give it a listen.  

New visitors to Plain Or Pan may be interested to learn that in November and December last year I was raided by the internet police. All music files dating from Nov 08 right back to Jan 07 were deleted. So the only music you can download from here is essentially anything since the start of 2009. Here’s some stuff you may have missed…

The first Plain Or Pan compilation album, compiling all the best bits of the now- deleted stuff. CD1 and CD2. Comes with artwork.

Over 20 versions of The La’s ‘There She Goes’. It’ll give you a sore head after a while, but, reallly, you need this.

The La’s legendary Kitchen Session. Listen to it here. Read about it elsewhere on Plain Or Pan. Take the time to find it and read about it, will you? Cheers!

The Beatles ‘Sgt Peppers..’ Master tape. Audio gold. A music fan’s wet dream. Call it what you will, but if you’re new to this, then prepare yourself!

The Beatles newly unearthed Revolution Take 20. Fake? Genuine? You decide!

Mojo magazine’s Johnny Marr compiled (by me) CD. With artwork. Here.

A rare mix of Marvin Gaye‘s ‘What’s Going On’.

The Arctic Monkeys do Van McCoy’s ‘Baby I’m Yours’. It’s a belter!

There’s tons of stuff on Plain Or Pan. I take time to ensure only the choicest, juciest most hard-to-come-by tracks are included. I’d be grateful if you could take the time to unearth some of it. A good compilation CD awaits those with patience and a good download speed.

Cover Versions, demo, Hard-to-find, Uncategorized

We’re Lost In Music. Caught In A Trap. I Quit…

Craig McAllister

I don’t quit. I merely quote you the lyrics of Sister Sledge. Bob Dylan holds them in such high regard he plays this track immediately before taking the stage each night on his never-ending tour. (ahem….cough….etc). Aye right.

previously-on-lost1

There’s a fine line between madness and genius and brilliance and shite, and I think I may have just (very belatedly) discovered the musical threshold by which an artist can cross over from one side to the other. I say ‘belatedly‘ because the following tracks have mostly been floating about the ether for a year or so and had I not been listening to Stuart Maconie’s Freak Zone on BBC 6 Music on Sunday night, they’d still be happily floating about the world wide web and I’d be none the wiser.

Just Wink

The Ballad of Sayid Jarrah

Be My Constant

The tracks in question have been recorded by Previously On Lost. As the advert says, it does just what it says on the tin. From Season 3 of ‘Lost‘ onwards, these 2 guys have written, recorded and released via their MySpace site a song a week, based on that week’s episode of Lost. Genius? Aye. The songs? Er….aye. It’s a bit Flight Of The Conchords, which is clearly no bad thing. In fact, that’s a very good thing, but I get the feeling these guys take themselves a wee bit too seriously. Anyway, their tracks vary in quality, length and genre on any given week. They pastiche doo-wop, Prince-style funk and any other genre you care to suggest. All played on the cheapest of Casio keyboards and plastic-sounding guitars and sung in the highest falsetto you could possibly achieve wearing skinny-fit cheapo Top Man jeans. If you’re a fan of Daniel Johnson or Ween they might be right up your street. Me? I love Flight Of The Conchords, but I think I prefer the real thing.

previously-on-lost-studio

Genius at work (?)

Let me know what you think. If you dig, feel free to go to the band’s website and buy Previously On Lost‘s new elpee, “The Tale of Season 4 and the Oceanic Six“. In the meantime, here‘s The Fall‘s version of Sister Sledge’s ‘Lost In Music’.

Le money il sur la table

Il money est sur la table

The palace of excess-uh  leads to the palace of access-uh!

Hiiiideawayyy!

What the fuck does that all mean? I mean, I can speak French and that, but what’s he on about? Make no mistake,  Mark E Smith is a true madness/genius threshold straddler.

Cover Versions, Hard-to-find

Warts ‘n All

Craig McAllister

This one’s for Rockin’ Rik and anyone else who likes a good dose of old fashioned horn skronking juke-joint blues-soul. Eli Paperboy Reed came to my attention via his now legendary (in mine and Rik’s house at least) performance on Later with Jools Holland.

Pity he reminds me of that unfunny excuse for a ‘comedian‘, Jimmy Carr, but we can forgive him that, as Eli’s only gone and recorded a cover of Motorhead’s ‘Ace Of Spades‘. And put it out on vinyl! Go Eli!

eli-ace-7

The Good

Tight-as-you-know-what Stax horns, a vocal delivery that would give Otis Redding nightmares and a drum break that’s ripe for sampling. It’s a limited release, and quite hard to find due to the fact that your average high street has no decent record shops, so I’ve put it up for you here. It’s all the same to me…

eli-paperboy-reed

Listening to Eli doing ‘Ace Of Spades’ reminded me of a single I bought back in 1993. Corduroy were on the hipper-than-hip (though ultimately fashionably flash in the pan) Acid Jazz Records. They were formed from the ashes of long-forgotten late 80s mod hopefuls Boys Wonder. Dressed head to toe in polo necks, winkle pickers and, yes, brown corduroy, Anthony without assistance from any of his Johnsons could no doubt have given them a good kicking without too much sweat breaking.

motorhead

The Bad

For about 5 minutes in 1993 I thought they were the Next Big Thing, mostly due to this, their cover of Motorhead’s ‘Motorhead‘. I remember playing it to some big hairy guy when I worked in Our Price. ‘Fucking shite” was his straightforward appraisal. I think it’s a wee bit better than that, but not much. It’s no Jamiroquai (make of that what you will). Extra points for the polite guitar freak out half way through.

motorhead-girlschool

Which brings me on to the real deal. Yer actual Motorhead. Noisy. Fast. Loud. What’s not to like about that? Or this? Their cover of Johnny Kidd and the Pirate’s  ‘Please Don’t Touch’ (with Girlschool). Now that’s what I call a proper guitar solo. This mp3 is taken straight from an old crackly 7″. If you want super hi-fi stereo you know where to look!

lemmy

The Ugly

entire show, Hard-to-find, Peel Sessions

Peel Slowly And See

Craig McAllister

On constant rotation chez moi this week has been the new long player from the Super Furry Animals. It’s called Dark Days/Light Years and it’s a belter. But you probably knew that. So far ahead of everyone else in terms of originality and imagination, I would say that the Super Furry Animals are currently the Best Band on the Planet.

super-furry-animals

Except they’re clearly not on this planet. To the uninitiated, on the face of it the Super Furries are just another generic indie guitar band. But look closer. Are there any other groups who can go seamlessly from pastoral folk to fuzzed guitar psychedelia to nose bleeding Belgian hardcore-apeing techno to native language singalongs? Effortlessly? Often in the one song? Nope. Of course not. So that’s settled. The Super Furry Animals are the Best Band (almost) on the Planet.

The band clearly stockpile songs and only release them when the stars are aligned and the vibe is right. ‘Inconvenience‘ from the new album sounds like Golden Retriever from their Phantom Power album, only with better lyrics. Gruff Rhys has said it was an old song looking for the right album. Looks like it found it. Even the slow songs on this album are fast, he’s said. And they are. But enough of that. If you’re a fan of SFA you’vre probably got the album by now. If you’re sitting on the fence, get off it now and hop over to any good music retailer, physical or online and take a punt. You won’t regret it. If you’re one of those folk who say you don’t like them (and there can’t be that many people), click on the link below and for free you can download the band’s Peel Session broadcast from John Peel’s house on 12th July 2001. Then get yourself over to any decent music retailer etc etc…

sfa-gruff

The session in question that was broadcast from Peel Acres is a cracker. In front of a small audience they go through 3 tracks from the Rings Around The World album that they were promoting at the time. They also play a Welsh language track that featured on that year’s Welsh language album Mwyng. But the highlight for me is the first track. Written on the way down to the session, reveals Gruff, ‘Zoom!‘ would not make it’s official appearance until 2005’s criminally under-rated ‘Love Kraft’ album. Another old song looking for the right album.

superfurryanimals

This session is as good an introduction to the Super Furries as anyone needs. Opening track ‘Zoom!‘ is a slow-burning builder of a song; a nice combination of acoustic guitars and Pink Floyd synths. By the time it had made it onto ‘Love Kraft’ it was twice as long and had swimming pool splashes, trumpets and all sorts of sonic embellishments on top, but the version here is pretty much complete from the off. Second track, ‘Fragile Happiness’ is worth hearing purely for the way mumbling Gruff sings “We’ll go to Miami“. It also sounds uncanilly like fellow pastoral folkies Gorkys Zygotic Mynci (seek them out if you’ve never heard them). With my ignorance of the Welsh language I have absolutely no idea what is being sung on ‘Nythod Cacwm’, but it’s that melodic you can sing along without needing to know the words anyway. Sevem minute long lighters-in-the-air power ballad ‘Run! Christian, Run!‘ follows and the whole session finishes with the excellent ‘A Touch Sensitive’. Sadly, not a cover of the Fall track (and given the setting, you could be forgiven for thinking that), it’s a hypnotic instrumental that sounds like the theme to some long lost sci-fi spy film. Big bass line, bubbling analogue synths, an echoey, dubby piano riff and Krautrock drums. Yep. Super Furry Animals. Hands down Best Band (almost) on the Planet.

sfa_feb2009

Beardy, weirdy and bloody magic

 

Cover Versions, Gone but not forgotten, Hard-to-find

Now I Wanna Be Your Blog

Craig McAllister

The curse of the blogger has struck. Inspiration (or lack of) has slowed down my writing recently. That and decent weather, school holidays and a list of ‘to do’ things from Mrs Pan which quite frankly is taking the piss. Today, in a rare frenzied bout of online activity I read the news that Steve Dullaghan, bass player and founding member of The Primitives had died, aged just 42. I felt compelled to write a wee bit. Just a very wee bit, as you will find out in the next paragraph.

primitives-crash-vid.jpg

I remembered a piece I wrote a couple of years ago, and given that I have more readers now than I did then, I figured that most of you reading this will be reading it for the first time. Apologies if you’ve been here before (and thanks for sticking around). To make up for it I’ve added a few extra tunes not included in the original post. Get most of them and you’ve got yourself a nice wee introduction to the music of The Primitives.

The Primitives were from Coventry and formed in 1985. Along with The House of Love and The Wedding Present, for me they filled the gap post-Smiths and pre-Stone Roses. I bloody loved them. Their first single was ‘Thru The Flowers’ which was released in May of 1986. I’ve got it on super sexy seven inch and I am open to offers. It’s not the same version that appeared on their debut album ‘Lovely’.

image401

Initially, they were very primitive and all the songs were noisy and sloppy because that is how they played. Listen to the demo of 2nd single ‘Really Stupid’ to see what I mean. Still sounds terrific to this day. John Peel was a bit of a fan, and like many acts of the day, the band recorded a session for him. Here‘s the twangy rockabilly gutterpunk of ‘Buzz Buzz Buzz’.

tracy

The obvious focal point for a teenage boy like me was Tracy Tracy who was cute as cute and looked a bit like Ruth Ellis (the last woman to be hanged in Britain). The others dressed head to toe in black, wore skinny jeans and pointy boots and at some point all had Ringo Starr circa 1965 haircuts (though sadly not in the photo below).

primitives

Whilst I was in love with Tracy, Paul the guitarist was clearly in love with Lou Reed and the Velvet Underground (Lou Reed’s first band was called The Primitives too) and he had a great collection of guitars – he was one of only two guitarists in the UK to own a particularly rare version of a Fender Thinline Telecaster. The other belonged to the guitar player from Culture Club. Fancy that! The band went through more line-up changes than Spinal Tap. The original drummer Pete Tweedie wasn’t very good, so most of their early stuff was actually done with a drum machine (something most people don’t realize – listen carefully and you’ll hear the click track at the start of ‘Stop Killing Me’) and Pete would play along on the ride cymbal or hi hat. They released six singles with the sixth being a re-recorded version of ‘Thru The Flowers‘ before they eventually signed to RCA in 1987.

 lovely

In 1988 the album ‘Lovely‘ was released and it is brilliant. It was a night and day change from their early singles. All of a sudden they knew how to play their instruments. The first change they made was getting rid of Pete the drummer. The next thing they did was re-record a few of their old singles, such as ‘Stop Killing Me’. I’m normally dead against bands who do that, but in The Primitives case it meant that 1) those early singles became quite collectable, and 2) the new ones arguably sounded better.

morrissey-prims-tshirt

Morrissey, out for a duck whilst wearing his Stop Killing Me t-shirt

The other key to their sound was producer Paul Sampson who went back through all their old demos and found ‘Crash‘, a song they had scrapped. This was their only big hit and became a bit of an albatross for them. You’ve probably heard it. That guy from Busted has got a version out just now. It’s in the new Mr Bean movie. Honestly!

primitives-crash

Anyway, sales inevitably diminished, and the band continued to release great singles that only myself bought.  ‘Way Behind Me’  and ‘You Are The Way’  being a fine examples. Co-written by Ian Broudie, You Are The Way in particular shoulda been a massive hit. I guess there’s just no accounting for taste.

image41

The hidden jewel in their crown for me though is a track that originally appeared on the b-side of ‘Way Behind Me’ and was re-recorded with the guitarist singing. ‘All The Way Down’ is a brilliant piece of pseudo-Nuggets hammond ‘n’ bongos psychedelia and YOU NEED IT! For good measure, you might also need the 1985 demo. Contrast and compare. They came a long way, eh?

Of course, the band eventually petered out. Recording as Pink Bomb, Tracy added her vocals to some generic Ministry Of Sound pishy dance track, and after recording as Starpower (here‘s their rather brilliant twang n reverb-heavy version of Lee n Nancy’s ‘Some Velvet Morning’ (with Tracy on vocals)) Paul became a graphic designer. Download the tracks above and remember them this way. And get over to Amazon or Play or wherever and pick up their Best Of for about £4.

Bonus tracks. Recorded live from the audience at Glasgow School of Art on March 19th 1988 ( a mere 21 years ago!!!), here’s another version of ‘Really Stupid’ and their cover of Iggy & the Stooges ‘I Wanna Be Your Dog’. Ruff ruff ruff-ruff! Or should that be rough rough rough-rough! Aye. No’ very good live, but pleasant to look at. I think I fainted at this gig. It was very warm. Saw the Sugarcubes there a month or so later. I didn’t faint at that one.

thru-the-flowers.jpg         ruth-ellis.jpg

tracy tracy                       ruth ellis

Cover Versions, Hard-to-find

Special K

Craig McAllister

JC over at the Vinyl Villain has, like many of us in the blogosphere recently, been the target of the DMCA. Quite rightly I suppose, the DMCA have the authority to remove music files and shut your blog down if you are clearly flouting copyright laws by sharing copyrighted material. This very blog nearly shut down over Christmas due to the severity of attention I was receiving, but thankfully this attention has subsided over the past few months. JC on the other hand is being targetted fairly frequently these days. On one occassion, a track by Paul Haig was removed without him knowing, despite the fact that the track in question was owned by the artist himself and not the record company as the DMCA thought. A couple of quick emails back and forwards to Paul Haig’s management later and JC was able to re-post the track. You can read more about it here. In Mr Haig’s honour, JC has asked the blogging community to stand as one in solidarity, with a cheeky Ferguson-McGregor two-fingered salute to any nit-picking internet fascists who may be lurking. Aye! You can count me in! Here at Plain Or Pan?,  Monday 6th April 2009 is officially Paul Haig Day.

postcard-records-sleeve

My own contribution to the cause is a track by Paul’s first band, Josef K. Signed to Postcard Records, they were like Orange Juice’s runny-nosed wee brother. They sounded like the type of band who would come home after the first day at school with both knees out of their new trousers and no leather left on the toes of their Clarks Commandos. Their itchy, scratchy and claustrophobic cheese wire thin guitar lines and elastic band basslines meant they were the epitome of post punk. A thousand and one fringe (meaning both haircut and success) guitar bands owe them a huge debt, whether they realise it or not.

josef-k-postcard-brochure

A couple of years ago, Domino Records released ‘Entymology‘, a compilation of the band’s Postcard and Belgian label Les Disques Du Crepuscules releases. This was my first introduction to Josef K. If you’ve never heard them before, read on. Mr Kapranos, you can shuffle off quietly to your rehearsal room again.

josef-k-disques-300

Sorry For Laughing was the band’s 4th single. Released 28 years ago (!!!) this month it failed to chart anywhere, yet to me it sounds like the definitive Josef K record. Slightly shambolic and out of tune, yet heartfelt and soulful. There’s a nice tambourine jangling about in the background. The Wedding Present were clearly taking notes on how to play those brillo pad scrubbed barre chords too. Hear it here.

josef-k-lyrics

lyrics as they appeared in a Postcard Records leaflet

Sorry For Laughing has been covered quite a few times, most notably by 80s Germanic stylistas Propaganda. Their version is the 80s – glacial synths, machine-like Teutonic vocals, bangs! Crashes! Zang tum tum! I’ve mentioned French covers artists Nouvelle Vague elsewhere before. Their version is lovely, sounding like The Cardigans duetting with Nico on happy pills. Glasgow’s own 1990s have done a version too, but their go at it remains elusive for now. Enjoy the tracks and remember to support the artists who made them etc etc blah blah blah…..

josef-k

Special K

 

demo, entire show, Hard-to-find, studio outtakes

Come down from the mountain, you have been gone too long…

Craig McAllister

…Spring is upon us, follow my only song. The clocks change this weekend, and the opening line from the Fleet Foxes ‘Ragged Wood’ has been ringing in my head since yesterday, when I logged onto The La’s forums to discover that Lee Mavers, my generation’s Syd Barrett, Arthur Lee and Howard Hughes rolled into one (Eccentric behaviour? Check. Reclusive lifestyle? Check. Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder? Check) has come out of hibernation for a one-off (or maybe more) guest spot on Pete Doherty’s tour.

mavers-doherty-1

He’s alive! And playing guitar! Picture copied from Las.org

Believe me, this has sent ripples of excitement towards anyone who still faithfully checks out what the La’s have been up to since 1990. For any uninitiated amongst you, here’s a quick summary…

tumbleweed

Yep. Ignoring the ironic attempt at humour, or the eagerly anticpiated yet ultimately unfulfilling 2005 ‘comeback”; Maver’s toothache problems meant he couldnae sing very well. Drummer problems of Spinal Tap proportions meant that Lee’s gardener (he has a gardener?!?) played the smallest drum kit imagineable whilst standing up, The La’s have been pretty much gone, dead and split up. So yeah, ripples of excitement have splashed their way across the ether towards anyone still holding a 20 year old torch in anticipation of the mythical second album. Even a new song would be nice. Or a new chord. Or a new anything. Until then, we’ll have to make do with this…

The internet is a wonderful thing, isn’t it?

They did ‘Son Of A Gun’ as well, which is easy enough to find on yer YouTube. I don’t want to clog this page up with videos when what I really wanted to give you was this……………….the Holy Grail of La’s recordings. Whispered in hushed tones from every corner of the Merseyssippi and beyond, rumoured to be an urban myth, a recording that wasn’t actually in existence, until 2005 when me, myself and I stupidly opened my metaphorical big mouth with one typed line on the La’s website. “The Kitchen tapes? I’ve got them.” Cue mass pandemonium. “No you don’t.” “Yes I do.” And my ego got the better of me. I won’t say how I got a hold of the original tape, but I feel I betrayed that person’s trust in a way. Sorry Mr L, if you’re reading. I know you browse here on occassion. As soon as I had copied the tape for one person it had spread like the River Irvine bursting its banks across the Low Green. It was everywhere. Every bloody file sharing site and half-arsed second rate blog posted it. And took the credit for it.  Anyone could hear the session. I was pissed off. You had to earn your La’s stripes first. You couldn’t just turn up to the party as a newcomer in 2005 and just be given it. But that’s what happened. The emails never stopped coming. “‘Eh a’right fella/la/mate etc. Eh, about dem Kitchen tapes. Any chance of eh, y’know. I’ll send you me addy and a stamp.” I still get the emails to this day, even though if they looked hard enough, any dim wit could find it on most file sharing sites. All my fault. I let it out the bag and I hate myself for it. But you might as well get it from me as poke about on those dodgy file sharing sites full of adverts for swingers in your area.

mavers

But the Kitchen Session itself. What is it? If you’ve never heard of it before now, here’s the facts. Sometime in 1989, the La’s were staying at a cottage in Devon, ostensibly to write songs for their second album. The cottage was owned by Andy MacDonald, label boss of Go! Discs. In preparation for him visiting, the band recorded themselves in the kitchen (good acoustics apparently) doing a half hour or so session on video camera. MacDonald later took the tape back to London where an audio copy of it made it’s way into my lucky bastard hands. The songs are almost complete but not quite. Apart from ‘I Am The Key’ none of the songs had ever been heard before. The session is a masterclass in songwriting. Mavers is clearly in charge, shouting instructions and changes to the assembled band – John Power (bass), Chris Sharrock (bongos, percussion, banging noises, now in Oasis) and Barry Sutton (guitar). “The song’s just started…….Bongos man! Nah, You should come in second….2, 3, 4!”  “ZZ Top! chaka-boom, chaka boom!“

He sings guitar riffs where they would appear in a studio recording. He scats, riffs and sings in that high falsetto that sounds so magical on The Hit Single the band are known for. Where the lyrics are incomplete, he makes up the words to fit the melody. He even sends himself up, him and Power singing Bryan Adams’ ‘Run To You’ at one point when they realise where they got the bassline from. But the songs. The songs! Pure gold! ‘Our Time’ features one of the best lines in any songs, ever.

“But the reasons unravel through the seasons I travel.”

Good, eh? I must’ve played my 17 year old tape about 300 times. As soon as I had the technology I converted it to a digital file, but for maximum effect I still like playing that old tape. It’s just about the best piece of music I own. Well. Apart from (insert obvious choice here) and so and so, but you know what I mean. The tape has reached such mythological status that it even has it’s own Wikipedia page (!) In fact, it’s so good only last week Mavers declared it “fucking rubbish“. Yes. It is that good. There is an inferior quality version in circulation which includes a daft R’n’B tune at the end. But if you want the original hi-fi/lo-fi master tape to wav file, the full unedited 34 minute Kitchen Session is here. I hope you enjoy every minute of it as much as I have. I’ve listened to it twice as I’ve written this article and it still knocks my socks off.

The official unofficial tracklisting is:

  • When Will I See You Again
  • Our Time
  • Robberman
  • She Came Down In The Morning
  • Was It Something I Said
  • It’s Not Impossible
  • Tears In The Rain
  • I Am The Key
  • band talking

    • A plea. My recording is taken straight from the video tape and converted to audio. If anyone out there has the video, well, I’m your best pal. Drop me a line. I can send you me addy and a stamp if you like, la.

    *If you like The La’s, and in particular studio outtakes, demos and the likes, you might want to click here. I put the music back up recently for a polite reader from Sweden.

    Hard-to-find, Sampled

    Collective Collected

    Craig McAllister

    I’m not a fan of posting new releases. There’s a million other blogs that do just that, and do it far better than I can. I actually don’t know enough useless information about new artists to make anything I write about them remotely interesting, so tonight I feel like I’m swimming a wee bit out of my depth. However, once in a blue moon a new track comes along that blows me away. Tonight that blue moon is shining once again.

    animal-collective

    I’ve been aware of Animal Collective ever since my pal Quinny mentioned them a couple of years ago. I’ve even got myself a real bought and paid for ginuwine CD copy of their latest album, ‘Merriweather Post Pavilion‘. More shame me, but I never paid much attention to Quinny’s goings on about them, or even the new album. I wish I had. Their new single, ‘My Girls’ has been getting tons of airplay on BBC6 Music. Why didn’t I notice that track that one time I played the album, I thought.  It’s like the Flaming Lips trying to play New Order, I thought. It’s got handclaps and bleepy noises and everything on it, I thought. It’s one thumping bassline away from You Got The Look by The Source featuring Candi Staton, I thought. It’s ripe for remixing, I thought. Pity then, I thought, that the Animal Collective are generally not for the remix game. Strange, given that their sound relies heavily on old keyboards, samples, loops and found sounds. Thank goodness for t’internet.

    animalcollectivemygirls

    From seemingly out of nowhere I found about half a dozen remixes of ‘My Girls.’ I’m not sure how official they are. It could be that some wee guy made them all up in his bedroom with his laptop. Bits of some them sound as if they were. Others sound fantastic. See what you think…

    The original version is here.

    The Hatchmatik Disco Bootleg is here.

    The Gigamesh Proper House Remix is here.

    The Mexicans With Guns Remix is here.

    The Dave Wrangler Remix is here.

    The Swine Forkbeard Remix is here.

    The Skinny Friedman DJ Edit is here.

    Phew. I’m off to reacquaint myself with the album. It looks like this…

    animalcollective

    I’ll tell you what it sounds like later.

    Maybe I didn’t waste that tenner after all.

    Hard-to-find

    That’s why I’m queasy like Sunday morning

    Craig McAllister

    And Sunday afternoon. And probably most of Monday too. Hangovers. Phhhhhhh. Not had one for a while. This one’s a cracker. I had it all planned that I would put up a couple of rip-roaring posts today, but that’s just not happening.  Got that constant sicky feeling and my head feels like, eh…..eh…..I dunno. Tch. You know what it feels like. Well. You think you do, but this one’s 10 times worse. This hangover is a killer.

    hangover

    I’d love to be under the covers with Tom Waits or Nick Drake on in the background. But with Plain Or Pan juniors 1 and 2 and a Mum who expects the Best Mother’s Day Ever, this idea is an absolute non-starter. Instead, the next best thing – Here‘s Tom Waits doing ‘Jesus Blood Never Failed Me Yet’, his collaboration with Gavin Bryars from 1993. It starts with a sample of a tramp singing the title over and over and ends with Tom Waits growling the same line on top of the saddest string section imaginable. If they were brave enough, Disney could score a film using this track. It’s melancholic, soulful and the perfect soundtrack to the hell that is my heid right now. Like it? Try this version from a Denver radio station broadcast in October 1999. Just Waits and a piano. Taken from a bootleg called ‘You’ll Like This One’. Aptly named.

    tom-waits

    Just in case you’re in danger of slashing your wrists and ending it all forever after putting yourself through those 2 tracks of downbeat maudlin melancholia, here‘s a raucous wee track to put you out your misery.

    johnny-shane

    The Grand Poobah, the King of the Hangover himself, Shane MacGowan‘s limited release from 1994, ‘That Woman’s Got Me Drinking’, featuring none other than Captain Jack Sparrow himself on guitar. Johnny Depp, in case you were wondering. Sounds like The Pogues doing Motorhead. Now there’s an excellent concept.

    Business as normal from tomorrow folks. Stay with me!

    tennents-lager-lovelies

    That woman’s got me drinking