Plain Or Pan

My previous Sandie Shaw post was surprisingly (for me) one of the most popular downloaded music posts on this entire blog. I mentioned that Sandie Shaw doing The Smiths’ ‘Hand In Glove’ would turn up at some point….and here it is.  

Released in April 1984, this version of ‘Hand In Glove’ was promoted as a Sandie Shaw solo release, although it is essentially The Smiths with Sandie Shaw coming straight off the bench as some kind of super-sub. All those Smiths fans helped the single reach the dizzy heights of number 27. Even the cover art of the single is Smithsy in appearance. I’d imagine all Smiths aficionados would have the 3 Smiths tracks Sandie covered by now, but if not, here you go… 

The 7” featured 2 tracks – the lead track and her version of ‘I Don’t Owe You Anything’. ‘Hand In Glove’ is a reverb-drenched bash-along that Siouxsie Sioux would be proud of. The lead guitar riff sounds like a glockenspiel, and I mean that in a good way. The outro is terrific too. Different to the original. Not better. Not worse. Just different.  

Apart from the unusual introduction, Sandie’s version of ‘I Don’t Owe You Anything’ sounds an awful lot like the Troy Tate produced version that was intended for their first album before The Smiths binned it at the last minute. Maybe, way back in ’84 before Bongo, Sting and all those other worthless eco-warriers, The Smiths were into recycling their old junk, giving it to someone more deserving. It’s got a creepy, churchy-sounding keyboard part playing through the background and tons of jangling, clipped 12 string Rickenbacker. And the final chord is niiiiiiiiice. Sandie’s got a nice warble to her voice too. I like this version a lot. 

The 12” featured ‘Jeane’ as an extra track. More acoustic than The Smiths, it’s just Johnny n’ Sandie, until some crooner in a big quiff and national health specs starts yodeling towards the end. No heavenly choirs, not for me and not for you, they sing. But I’m not so sure. Sandie Shaw’s 3 Smiths covers are amongst some of my favourite records.    

Forgive me father, for I have sing-ed

Around the time of the record’s release, Morrissey said, “I met her a few months ago and it seemed perfectly natural for me to seize the opportunity and ask her to work with us and she was incredibly eager and incredibly enthusiastic. She really liked the songs and she was very eager to do it. So, it’s happened and I’m very pleased.” Four years later, post-Smiths and bored of Smiths-obsessed journalists, he cut short one inquisitive interviewer with, “It was so great for me personally that I don’t actually remember it happening“. 

Is that real leather she’s wearing?

*   ’Kiss My Shades’ was the wee message scratched into the run-off groove of the 7”, trainspotters.   

…..Gie’s ma effin’ Halloween. So goes the battle cry of every West of Scotland child this Wednesday night. Apart from all the teeth-melting tablet, I hate Halloween. When I was younger I hated it cos every year my Dad dressed me up as a one man band. Every year. And every year, every house I went into I’d be asked the same question. “Who are you supposed to be?” Two years ago I painted myself yellow and put on a bald wig. Mrs Plain Or Pan painted herself yellow and put on a 3 feet high blue Amy Winehouse style wig. “Who are you supposed to be?” they asked again. D’oh! Like I said, I hate Halloween. These tracks are for all you Scary Monsters, Super Creeps  and Vampires who dare to dress up this week.

First up is someone who’s no stranger himself to dressing up, David Bowie. Some say that the ‘Scary Monsters…‘ album was his last true great record. I don’t know. I actually really like ‘Heathen‘ from 2002.

Two versions of ‘Scary Monsters’ for you. The first I’ve got on a bootleg titled simply ‘Live and Acoustic 96 97’. Sorry I can’t give you much more information on the track in question but it’s a belter. Bowie talks about Johnny Cash at the start. It’s delivered in the style of Johnny Cash and if Rick Rubin’s listening he must surely be tracking Bowie down as the next megastar in line for the ‘American Recordings’ treatment. The second version is from a well known bootleg called ‘Vampires Of Human Flesh’ (that’s the cover above) that has alternate/demo versions of the ‘Scary Monsters’ album.

I once read that Mercury Rev had the brilliant idea of recording the whole of Neil Young’s ‘OnThe Beach’ LP and putting each track out individually as a b-side to all the singles they released from the ‘Deserters Songs’ album and beyond. Great idea, considering ‘On The Beach‘ was unavailable at the time. Of course, you can get it now but that’s not the point. Thing is, Johnathon Donahue sounds an awful lot like Neil Young. If you were being nasty you’d say he couldn’t really sing. I’d say his voice is a fragile thing of beauty etc etc. In any case, Mercury Rev got round to recording only 2 ‘On The Beach’ tracks. ‘Vampire Blues’ was Neil Young’s rant against the oil industry. “I’m a vampire baby. Sucking blood from the Earth.” He likes a rant does old whiny Neil. Anyone heard Chrome Dreams 2 yet? Still not sure if I like it or not. Anyway. Mercury Rev’s Vampire Blues is fantastic. Some open/drop tuning acoustic guitars, Donahue’s thin reedy voice and not much else. I think it was originally done for an XFM radio session, but it eventually appeared on the ‘Delta Sun Bottleneck Stomp’ CD single.

Bonus track. Mercury Rev also got round to recording ‘Motion Pictures’. This version has some nice bluesy acoustic guitar playing and prog keyboards. It’s a cracker, even better than ‘Vampire Blues’ I think. Now. When will Mercury Rev do ‘Ambulance Blues’?

Aye. That Chris Stein’s a lucky so and so. Dreamin’. Dreamin’ is free. Aah Debbie Harry…..(tails off….)

The Best Of Blondie was one of the first albums I bought. The very first was ‘Kings of the Wild Frontier’ by Adam and the Ants. I bought Complete Madness and the Blondie album not long after. I recently dug out my old vinyl and played Blondie for the first time in ages. Reading the sleeve notes and credits and all that kinda stuff, I realised that Blondie didn’t actually do the originals of some of their tracks. I knew about ‘The Tide Is High’. I got big into reggae about 10 years ago and heard John Holt’s original. And I knew that ‘Hangin’ On The Telephone’ was an old new wave track, although I’d never heard the original version. But I didn’t know that ‘Denis’ was also a cover.

‘Denis‘ began life as ‘Denise‘ and was a reasonably big doo-wop hit for Randy & The Rainbows, making #10 in September 1961. Randy & his Rainbows aren’t that well known. You could probably call them one hit wonders. In the doo-wop world, if Dion & The Belmonts were The Beatles, Randy & The Rainbows were Freddie & The Dreamers. ‘Denise’ sounds like something you might hear in the background of ‘American Graffiti’ or one of those coming of age American films. I like it. So too did Blondie.

As well as pre-Beatles teen pop, Blondie had an ear for more exotic music. I don’t know who in the band heard John Holt/The Paragons version of ‘The Tide Is High’. The track was released to massive indifference in 1965 and sank without a trace. It got no radio play and made no chart anywhere. But someone somewhere in New York must’ve heard it, cos in 1980 Blondie took it all the way to #1 in the UK. We won’t mention Atomic Kitten at this point.

The Nerves were about to chuck it. They had no money and no success. Main Nerve Jack Lee had a wife and child, with another on the way. Without money, his electricity and phone were about to be cut off. Lucky for him he still had his phone when Debbie called out of the blue. “This is Deborah Harry, I’m in a band called Blondie, we really like your song Hanging On The Telephone and we want to record it on our album.” Ker-ching! Blondie’s version isn’t that far removed from the original. A glossier production and far better drumming. Otherwise, the guitars stay the same and it’s the same record. Apart from the way she sings “show you my affection“. Even as a 10 year old I knew that was sexy. I’ve always wanted to be able to play ‘Hanging On The Telephone’ on the guitar. I still can’t.

 Even though they hated one another, Blondie’s success went globally bonkers mental when they got together with producer Mike Chapman. Being from LA, he had no concept of the New York CBGBs scene that was crucial to Blondie’s sound. The band distrusted him and thought he’d been sent to destroy their music.  In today’s terms, it’s a bit like Pete Doherty and Babyshambles being forced to record with Mark Ronson or the Xenomania team. Maybe no bad thing, but that’s another discussion. Anyway, Chapman went on to produce all the big hits – ‘Sunday Girl’, ‘The Tide Is High’, ‘Hanging On The Telephone’, ‘Dreaming‘, ‘Atomic‘, I could go on but you get the idea. His biggest success was with ‘Heart of Glass’, a track Blondie had been playing in various styles for years. By the time Blondie came to record it with Chapman, disco was the new thing, and the band duly obliged with Chapman’s wishes that they embrace the new scene wholeheartedly. What had previously been an ordinary sounding plodding bluesy track suddenly became a bona fide disco-rock crossover smash hit, and Debbie’s face was everywhere. Here’s the demo version that Chapman got to work on. The moral of this tale? Never underestimate the importance of a good producer.

“Call me Mr Phil Spector…please call me…….”

As you probably know by now, Radiohead have surprised everyone by making their new album (In Rainbows? Hmmmm, sounds like a Mariah Carey record) available for download from next Wednesday, 10th October. In a move meant to scupper the illegal downloaders and leechers, they’ll let you order the whole album as a download for whatever price you fancy paying. You can pay a pound for it if you like. I bought the super-sexy box set version that gets delivered in December. There’s nothing better than holding a real copy of a real album. Especially when the box set also includes 2×12″ vinyl records and a second CD of new stuff. Until then, next Wednesday’s download will do very nicely, thank you. To celebrate, here‘s the 1997 version of Radiohead wearing their prog influences proudly on their skinny fit sleeves by doing Pink Floyd’s ‘Wish You Were Here’ sometime around 1997. I think it’s from a charity album or something. It’s very good. Some cello, some backwards guitar and a whole load of tortured artist vocals that don’t really sound like Thom Yorke. If anyone knows any more about this track, cos I clearly don’t, please let me know. If you’ve never heard it, it’s worth the download.

If you’re a guitar geek, here’s how Thom set up his gear in 1997…….

Of course, these days he plays a bit of piano, some Apple Mac and a smattering of Fair Trade wooden spoon. But you can’t have it all.

 Edit. What price did you pay for yours? A survey.